Not your parents church anymore
Where are the women?
Here is an email from Sally Jean Morgan - author of Worship Evangelism and a good friend. I included her comments because she has always has a pulse on where the Church is headed and what it is missing.
Rex,
Hi from Sally Jean. I'm writing from my old e-mail address, as it's the only one that I can get to work for me when I'm on the road. I'm in Pasadena, about to lead one of my Conversations for women leaders.
They're all D Min or prospective DMin students at Fuller.
I wish I could be with you in Irving on the 4th. You know how I Iove story, and because I love film, I've also done my share of work on the hero's journey, which - in the wake of Joseph Campbell - has been at the core of Hollywood's script writing for years. Of course, Campbell studied the stories of all major civilizations and cultures. And drew a great deal from Greek mythology. A host of writers, including C.S. Lewis, consider a knowledge of Greek mythology foundational to the art of writing. And in Greek mythology (an Minoan, Norse, etc., etc.) women are heros, participating in the grand adventure of life as much as men. Narnia would have been a much different tale if Lucy had been Luke. But she wasn't. It is interesting that Lewis casts her as pre-adololescent. Perhaps heroism before the sexual change is somehow more palatable. The Greeks would have disagreed.
Be that as it may, you probably see where I'm headed here. John Eldredge's book, Wild at Heart, spoke to the hearts of many men, and he borrows from the classic hero's journey to make many of his points. I can appreciate that he has helped Christian men rediscover purpose and meaning for their lives. Unfortunately, he set women back millennia in the same volume. I was at a large conference when he summarized what Wild at Heart had to say about women.
"Women don't get to go on adventures...but they do get to be rescued. They get to be princesses." It made me wonder what it was I'd been doing for two decades.
I can't remember if you have daughters, but if you do, I would hope that you are teaching them that God has a great adventure in mind for them...one in which they get to act heroically, not just be acted upon. I would hope that at your event your would challenge the exclusive language of heroism as it was presented in your article. There were no feminine heros there. There were no feminine metaphors, no references to women in great acts of bravery.
I understand that it may have just not occured to you to include them. But that has been our lot as women. Unless men decide that we are visible - that we matter enough to be named and included in partnership - they render us invisible. By default. Surely, we cannot simply blot out the Jane Goodalls, the Margaret Meads, the Georgia O'Keefes, the Madame Curies, Amy Sempletons, the young woman who discovered the SARS virus cure, and women basketball players of the world. This is not the church at its best when pioneering and risk-taking is done by one gender. The Samaritan woman risked everything when she ran back to her village and broadcast the gospel (she was the first evangelist, by the way - is that enough adventure?). The woman who annointed Jesus' feet did the same. The three women who obeyed and went back to the disciples, heralding Jesus' resurrection knew what they were risking and they got it: derision. Laughing stock. Addled women.
If I were there at the event, Rex, I wonder, where would I fit? Where would my daughter fit? Yours? If we don't change our present, the future is not going to change itself. The Church is missing half its pioneering gifts. Over half. The average congregation is 63 percent female. And we are telling them - by default, of course, never directly...because politically correct postmoderns would never say it out loud - that they don't get to break new ground for God because they were born with the wrong genitalia? We can do better.
You know how I respect your work, which is why I am writing. You have influence, and it is well deserved. You have supported me and my work for years, and so I know that your heart is not accurately epresented in the exclusivity of your article. If my letter has spoken truth, then take that truth and wrestle honestly with it at your gathering. Thanks, Rex.
Sally Jean Morgan
Bill Buchanan Responds
Hi Rex
I will be at the event (conference, seminar, hoe down?) this Friday at IBC. I'm not entirely sure what to expect . . . but that's part of the fun. What I hope it isn't is a bunch of males in suits trying to inspire me to do something. I've got the inspiration and I'm on the path to doing . . . so I don't really know what I will get out of this.
That sounds a bit negative doesn't it? Not really intended to be and I'm usually not quite soooo skeptical sounding either :) I promise to come with an open mind, open ears and open heart - no really, I will :)
I noticed that one of the comments from an email was centered around "where are the women?" Having just edited the IBC Forum on the role of women in the leadership of the church . . . I suppose I'm a bit more attuned to that issue than before. I have to agree with the author - it does appear to be a "guy club" event.
Anyway - I really am looking forward to it and pray that it will be a beneficial time for all.
Bill Buchanan
Doug Inman, the driving force behind The Miracle League in Arlington
COLLEYVILLE — How many miracles are we allowed in this life? And if you’ve already been part of one, is it asking too much to pray for another? Doug Inman thinks about those questions a lot these days. Last April, he was living a miracle. Now, without another, he will die in a matter of months.
We are sitting in the kitchen of his new Colleyville home. Next to me on the table, a Bible lays open, ready for use.
Miracles are in there, I think to myself. One more, Lord. Just one more.
The first time I met Doug Inman, he made me cry. I suspect, as we begin to talk, that he is about to do so again.
For the last 18 months or more, Inman has been the driving force behind Miracle Fields of DFW, the specially designed baseball diamond at
It was a project of such impact on the community, such humanity, that it earned Doug
With treatment... no one knows for sure.
"My goal is to look past doctors, who can be god-like, and see God on the other side," Inman says. "I think that’s really important. I’m not looking for the doctors to save me. It’s going to be the Lord, who may honor a treatment and decide, ‘Hey, I’m going to let this guy have another swing, give him another at-bat.’
"I want to squeeze the doctors for all the wisdom and talent they have, but this is a pure God thing now."
Inman, who made a fortune developing, marketing and selling medical instruments and devices all over the world, knows a little something about "God things," having seen The Miracle League come to life here.
Inman and two other friends showed up at my house in 2005 with a DVD and one of the most amazing stories I’d ever heard. It was about something called The Miracle League, where kids in wheelchairs, kids with walkers, blind kids, autistic kids, Down syndrome kids, could play baseball.
They showed me the DVD, which featured a couple reports on the national news, and I saw the kids’ faces, heard their screams of delight when they hit the ball, watched every one of them hit a home run. Nobody loses. Everybody wins.
Hey, you’d have cried, too. I was sold, lock, stock and barrel, and told them I would gladly write about The Miracle League.
By last April, it was done. With Inman supplying the energy, the devotion, the time, the effort, the leadership, even, I’m sure, more than his share of the $400,000 that was needed, the field was ready to go. It was an amazing accomplishment, enriching the lives of everyone who shared in the experience.
The kids played ball, the "buddies" laughed and cried with them on the field, and parents brought their children from all over the Metroplex to play in The Miracle League.
"The Miracle League was a spiritual experience for me," Inman says. "It was a stepping out in faith, the first time I’ve done any community service in my life. I feel like the reason it was so successful was because I was just obedient to what God wanted me to do.
"Whatever I’m going through right now, whether it’s my death experience or my survival experience, is also a spiritual experience.
Even as The Miracle Field of Arlington was opening, Doug was beginning his life-or-death struggle. Two days after opening day last April 22, he went to the doctor to have a mole removed from the back of his head and discovered it was a melanoma.
"The day we had the grand opening, which was a real achievement for all of us, we had a lot of people there, and I remember, in an ad lib kind of way, quoting the Lou Gehrig thing," Inman remembers. "I made the comment that I considered myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth. And when I said that, I had this little twinge ... Whoa! When he said that, he was on his way out."
Still, there was no sign of further cancer in Inman’s lymph nodes at the time. It wasn’t until he had his six-month, post-surgical checkup three weeks ago that a CT scan showed the inoperable tumors in his lungs. It was devastating news.
"There’s no way to describe it," Inman says. "The reality is, we’re all going to die. I just didn’t plan to die now. The Lord’s numbered my days and I trust he’s got the right number. He knows what he’s doing.
"I think there’s a famous quote, ‘Death is always a surprise.’ I don’t care what the situation is, it’s ‘My goodness, I’m really going to die.’ It really brings a lot of things into focus."
He begins treatment at M.D. Anderson in
"It’s about quality of life now," he says. "If one of the doctors says you’ve got five months and we can stretch it to eight with chemotherapy, I’m going to have to really pray about that. If I can have four good months rather than eight lousy ones... I don’t know. That’s a hard decision to make."
Suddenly, Inman’s once-crowded list of things to do has grown very, very short. There’s his wife and best friend, Margaret. And there are his three daughters and his nine grandchildren, ages 1 to 15.
"You know the cliches, but this is one of those deals where your priority list gets sorted out so quickly. The hard part is the family," he says, and then he begins to cry. "The tough part of it is... I know where I’m going, and I have faith. I’m OK there. It’s just all the stuff you miss, all those things you envisioned doing with your kids and grandkids.
"When you boil it all down, it’s about loving my family, being with all my friends. It’s about loving the Lord properly and being in a right relationship with him. That’s all there is. Nothing more."
It’s the kindness of others that brings Doug to tears most often now, even more than his own situation. Like the FedEx letter he got from a guy he just knew as Frank, who sat behind him at Cowboys games with his own family. When Doug wasn’t there for a game recently, the friend he’d given his season tickets to told Frank what the situation was.
The letter arrived the next day, putting Frank’s private plane and pilot at his disposal whenever he needs it.
"People are so good," he says. "They come out of the woodwork with things, a willingness to help. Those are the things that are hard for me, because I’ve always tried to be on the other side of that deal.
"People want to start giving into your life and it’s just so encouraging and so humbling."
Don’t get the idea that Doug has given up. Far from it. He is determined to fight this thing, to go down swinging, to get in a few licks of his own before this is over.
"I feel like I’m about to get in the ring with a 380-pound guy with 3 percent body fat," he says. "He’s intent on kicking my rear. Somehow I want to strategize, and last long enough so that maybe I’ll get a lucky punch in and knock him on his butt.
"The battle in this whole thing, is maintaining hope. You’re looking for rays of hope, so anybody who brings hope, I open the door to."
Hope, though, is the one thing Doug seems to be brimming over with. It streams from his eyes, it pours from his very soul. This is who he is now and if you think it will fade when the injections start, or when the poison starts seeping into his system or the tumors start taking away his breath, you don’t know Doug Inman.
Inman is like the little girl I read about who was suffering from three kinds of cancer. Asked if she thought God still had a plan for her, she smiled as she answered, "Sure, it’s to make all the people who don’t have cancer understand that they have to love each other every day."
Doug is on that same mission now, and he’s accustomed to success.
"I’ve got this thing about living one day at a time figured out," he says smiling. "This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.
"Today’s great. I feel good. I’ve got a loving wife. I’ve got kids I’m going to see today. I’m going to get my piano tuned up. Life’s good.
"If I could have figured this out when I was 20 years old and lived life one day at a time. That’s what the Lord tries to teach us. Life has enough worries of its own. Just try to take care of today."
Doug’s wife has joined us now and she’s smiling, too.
"I still think God’s got a plan for me," Doug says. "I just have to be sure I’m in the middle of his will and walk in it."
Now get this: I’m getting up to leave and Doug asks if he can pray for me. Here he is, facing who knows what debilitating treatment over the next months and ultimately death, and he wants to pray for me!
See, I told you he’d make me cry again.
So as the three of us — me, Margaret and Doug hold hands and he prays aloud — I silently choke out my own prayer around the tears that won’t be stopped now.
One more miracle, Lord. Just one more.
Jim Reeves, 817-390-7760 revo@star-telegram.com
Barry J - "Idle Tentmakers - Scares the Stew out of Me"
"A pastor or church leader will need to talk to a tentmaker one-on-one. A church will not tap into the tentmaker's potential through a general announcement." That's the ticket! The pastors of larger churches perhaps have traded the more enjoyable, meaningful task of tending the sheep for the strangely alluring exercise of managing a machine bureaucracy. Believe me, the bureacracy will manage itself, but the sheep certainly can't tend themselves. This being said, idle tentmakers should not continue to stand by and wait for someone to tap their "valuable" potential. It's time for us to get in the game! (Phew, scares the stew out of me!)
iGen Manifesto Feedback
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god_article.php?id=7333
Joseph Ryan III (20 years old)
As you know my role at Christ Fellowship is to manage all the data of the church membership making sure it is accurate and comprehensive. I also help others analyze that data to help the ministries.
Before I go tell you what we are thinking about at the church I want to just get out a few thoughts on what I think our world is doing from a social point of view. Being that this is my first major job and that I have responsibilities that I alone cannot handle I have been trying to understand just how large organizations work. I feel that creation is a perfect example of how it works. As you know our bodies are made up of extremely small and specialized things called cells. These cells make up a structure not one of them can ever comprehend. All they have to worry about is doing their predetermined function and reaction with the functions and changes of its neighbors and environements, reactions which are also predetermined. The cell does not have to know what it is even a part of in order for it do its job. I think the same is true for large organizations of people. I went to Disney world the other day and I heard they have something like 30,000 employees in Orlando Florida. I put myself in the seat of the CEO of Disney and thought how I would implement an idea in a way that even the guy sweeping the sidewalks would respond. I realized that it can't be done by any logistical way but has to be done by a change in the culture or atmosphere of what makes Disney Disney. In reality though, who makes up that culture? Its each individual employee or customer. But if the people are the ones who are governed by the culture then how can the people change the culture? This is a mystery to me but it shows me that people are not in a one to many relationship with their environment but a many to many relationship.
This is how communities have formed throughout history and I think the size of communities has been limited by the ability for the people to influence the culture. The limiting factor of this has been proximity. Technology has slowly reduced this limiting factor to the point where it is possible to have communities that span the globe. In my previous generations the technology only allowed for a one to many relationship where small gruops of people would influnce many groups. This obviously is seen in the media, large corporations and especially government. Most of the communication happens in one direction. Now however, we have the ability to have equal communication in both directions. Examples of this would be things you mentioned in your article like the open source movement and things such as wikipedia. Interestingly I think this is going to give our society something it has never had. The community based society such as that found in the early church and the collaboration of the entire world.
So what does this mean for the church? Well I think it is very exciting. The church has been no stranger to the one to many relationship of our past generation. This however fails to meet a critical need of our humanity which is to make a difference in the culture we choose to be governed by; something that my generation expects. I can only imagine what impact this will have on governments. Could we really have a true democracy one day? I don't know if that is wonderful or scary... This is what technology gives us. The size of a globally united community in resources and knowledge with the power to have equal influence in that society. I believe church is supposed to be that of a small group of people where all have a relative equal part in the creation of the atmosphere in the group. All these groups have been united in the teachings of Christ with one mission but there has been lacking one piece. The ability for these groups to collaborate in the Mission. This is what I believe the next generation of the Christian church will look like.
I actually just had a series of seemingly disconnected meetings with various people at Christ Fellowship. One was with a guy who is trying to develop a web based community for his leadership network, the other was with my boss. He and I have recently been thinking about this thing and it finally came out this week that our goal for the technology piece of our church is to develop a web based community not just for our staff, volunteers and members of our church but those of the surrounding churches. I have no doubt in my mind that there will one day be a worldwide, united Christian church using the powers of the internet to collaborate on everything from theological enlightenment to missions. It is just a matter of time and who. Ironically, I think this is also the only system in which one man (the antichrist) will be able to influence the world (culture) in a way to accomplish his mission.
I love talking about this stuff and I am honored that you wanted my thoughts.
Regards,
Joe III
Fountain of Life Church - Naperville, IL
Rex
I just finished your article and I had to respond. This is a thorough, yet concise, treatise in the issues that the church faces today. I applaud your challenge. I am sending a copy of this to all of the elders in my church for their thoughts.
We have just made a significant structural and paradigm shift in the past 2 months. We have eliminated the Senior Pastor and the clergy/laity model and shifted to a group of elders as servant leaders of the church. We have 8 men who have all embraced this new responsibility. I have been chosen to serve as Presiding Elder and Senior Leader for the church. In addition we have created 3 other leadership circles, with men and women both serving. This model is built on nurturing the “5-Fold” ministries to work in the church to equip the entire membership to do ministry together. It has already raised conflicts, so it’s working wonderfully.
I don’t know if the traditional church community can make the turn or not. As an optimist, I like to believe that anything is possible if we are willing to persevere. It’s too early to tell what the outcome will be, but early signs are that enough people have enthusiastically jumped on board to give it some momentum. I think that with any social group, good leadership can create momentum and the rest will begin to come alongside and join in, bit by bit. So who knows, the dream may still come true; a body of believers where everyone finds their role and practices ministry, where hierarchy is seen as an obstacle to success, and where the proper working of each individual part causes the body to build itself up in love. The reality of this dream, I believe, is to become the church that turns the world upside down, not the other way around.
Gotta take risks to see something happen. Right?
Rich Raad - Senior Pastor Fountain of Life Church - Naperville, IL
Columbia City United Methodist Church, Indiana
Atlanta, GA
At our church, most of our attendees are now Web 2.0 types; but the lead elder refuses to leave his closed system. The more that people express desire for dialogue and collaboration, the more he entrenches himself.
It is obvious that he is going down; and unfortunately, is going down swinging as hard as he can. I am an elder, and in response to the needs of the attendees have tried to integrate Church 2.0 (without knowing what it was), but now have finally given my resignation notice.
We want meaningful conversations, and dialogue that flatten hierarchical command-and-control authority stuctures within the church. Spiritual authority is healthy but it becomes spiritual-abuse in a closed system.
We say a lot of the right things but in practical terms we are beginning to run more like an independent baptist church. Would love to learn and be a part of a conversation more about how Church 2.0 is manifesting itself in real life.
Matt B - More than a Building
I have been a member in a number of different churches. The mega church route was to run members through classes designed to familiarize them with the theology and structure of the institution. The final step was s personality test to place you into the appropriate ministry. This approach seemed very carnal to me. I don't see how parking cars and working in the nursury bring people into spiritual union with Christ. Fruitfulness is not tied to organization building, but kingdom building. Kingdom building is tied to authentic Spiritual reproduction and discipleship. The nuts and bolts of church life should be community and one-to-one discipleship. This is what we are called to. Parking lots are not ministry. They are maintenance of the institution. Matt B.
Samson and the Pirate Monks - Review by Ed Chinn
The summary passage in the fine, but strangely titled, new book, Samson and the Pirate Monks (Thomas Nelson, 2006) is:
“. . . while Jesus does offer a personal relationship to every one of his disciples, he never promises any of us a private one. Jesus first said, “Follow me” to two men, not just one, and to those two he quickly added ten more. Later, when he sent the disciples out to represent him, he sent them out in pairs. . . For years I had been begging God for a private solution to my private problems, and he had always ignored that request.” (page 73)
The key point of the book is: Isolation will kill you. Victory is only found in fellowship.
Author Nate Larkin tells a very compelling and screamingly funny story of growing up in a fundamentalist Pentecostal church. Because that is my own background, his observations – on sin, hell, worldly entertainment, etc. – ring like a steel-driving hammer.
Naturally, he grew up damaged. Larkin emerged into adulthood as a raging sex addict. Of course, he assumed that getting married would fix it. Right. When his problem continued, he knew he must go into the ministry in order to fix himself. Ah, yes, good ideas. We’ve all had ‘em. We’ve all hated ourselves in the morning.
In the predictable path, Larkin hit the wall. He chronicles his moral descent in details which would have been impossible in Christian publishing a few years ago. Finally, at rock bottom and living in middle Tennessee, he Googled “sex addiction nashville.” A blizzard of websites (12-step programs, counseling services, workshops, retreat centers, etc.) came up. That was the beginning of Larkin’s journey into light.
Larkin paid attention and made good notes during his journey. He knows that– in the same way that black lung disease is for miners – isolation is the pattern “occupational hazard” for men (my words, not his). Men are, by nature, loners and liars. Samson is our mascot; leading with our strengths and surviving for years without major collapse or scandal, we quickly assume that special rules apply, that we are bulletproof. From that point, we cross a line . . . after which, we never again open the dark cellars of our heart. That gives the enemy an advantage; too often, we end up blind, enslaved, and serving at the enemy’s pleasure.
With the best and highest reasons, we can avoid “it,” ignore it, circumvent it, stuff it, and deny it. And, when we do that, we contribute to our own spiritual rot and death. If any man reads this book with an ounce of integrity, it’ll scare the hell out of him.
One of my favorite moments in the book is when Nate tries to BS a prospective mentor about taking his problem “to God.” The man wisely cuts through the crap by saying, “The next time you decide to call God, call me. Call God by calling me.” I like the way that offends the religious mind with a steel hammer ring of spiritual reality.
P. S. Larkin’s particular weakness is sex (seems that I’ve heard of this in other men). But, this book is equally applicable to any addiction.
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